Vampires in New Orleans

Vampires in NOLA
===

Kenny: [00:00:00] So you're in New Orleans on Fat Tuesday, and to get away from some of the craziness, you decide to step into an alleyway in the French Quarter. For a moment, you have a little reprieve from the chaos happening on the street, but then something doesn't feel quite right. You feel like you're being watched,

you try to. Move quicker into the alleyway just to get through it very quickly. But all of a sudden, a pale figure stands before you with glowing eyes, and then it's too late. Everything goes black. Welcome back to Into the Rift Podcast, season two, episode eight. I'm your host Kenny. Joining me is my brother and co-host Garrett 

Garrett: Yo. 

Kenny: And today we're talking about vampires in New Orleans. So New Orleans. It's not like [00:01:00] super like just known for vampires, but there is like a, a lot of kind of like some vampire lore.

Dating back really to like the, to the founding of the city with one of the myths that we're gonna be getting into. And then in the thirties there was another little peak, but things didn't really start to get more like vampirism didn't start to get more popular in New Orleans until Anne Rice's novels.

So after those came out, and then obviously when you had the movie interview with a vampire come, come out and all that kind of stuff. But, uh. When that started to happen, that's when a lot more of the like vampires tours and like vampire books and like vampire this and that. That's when things started to get really more.

Popular and now it's even like a tourism draw for the city. There's like haunted walking tours. You can, and they'll go and they'll tell you like vampire stories of [00:02:00] what supposedly happened in the city as they guide you around. And so now it's even like a tourism draw for the place. So a lot of the vampire myths are rooted in unexplained deaths, uh, a little bit of Catholic mysticism, and then just a lot of the like, kind of the chaos of what happens in the city.

One of the first ones we'll get into is actually the story of the Carter Brothers. This happened back in 1932. There was a young girl running down Royal Street and she was panicking. She was intercepted by a police officer. And when he asked her what was going on, at first he thought her story was kind of farfetched.

So she reportedly being, um, she reported being tied up by two brothers, along with other, other victims, and they were held captive so that the brothers could drink their blood. 

Garrett: As one does, 

Kenny: as one does. The girl claimed that she was only able to escape because the brothers were careless in securing the ropes that they used to tie her down.

The police didn't [00:03:00] really believe her, but they agreed to follow her back to the home on the corner of Royal and Saint Anne. So once the police and the girl arrived at the house, which was owned by the Carter Brothers, they were horrified to find it as the girl had described four other victims, half dead, tied to chairs in one of the rooms.

All the victims had their wrists wrapped bandages, and they were moist and stained with blood. And then there was two bodies wrapped in blankets that were tucked away. In another room, there was this unmistakable suffocating odor of death permeating the whole house. Supposedly what the brothers would do is they would leave early each morning just before daybreak and return every evening, just after dark.

And, uh, once they got home, they would take the bandages off of their, uh, victim's wrists and they would use a knife and slit their wis wrist, their wrist open again until blood was flowing. They, they, yeah, they would, the wis, yeah, they would slit, they would slip their wrist open until blood would start flowing again.

And they caught [00:04:00] the blood in cups, which they drank until supposedly they were sated 

Garrett: you scrape and lick. Uh

Kenny: uh, but they caught the blood in cups in which they, that's when they like drank it from, they would then redress the wounds with fresh bandages. So they, they literally didn't speak very much while they were in the rooms with the victims and they gave no concern for their wellbeing. So they were just using them to drink blood.

Garrett: Well, do you 

talk to your oranges when you peel them?

Kenny: Yes. I get them loving little names. 

Garrett: Hey 

Timmy, don't mind me. Just go split the top open. 

Kenny: So they would like, obviously they were drain, drain their victim until they died, and then wrap 'em in a towel or blanket. Throw them in the room. 

Garrett: Ball 

it up in the corner with the napkin. 

Kenny: Yeah, so they weren't aware that, obviously, that the girl escaped.

So the brothers were doing their routine as normal, 

Garrett: scrape and lick 

Kenny: except now the police. [00:05:00] Oh my God. So now the brother, uh, the police were waiting for them, for them to come back. Right? So according to the legend, their strength like wasn't human. It took many officers to capture and subdue the brothers.

When they captured, they almost immediately confessed, uh, begging to be murdered. 

Garrett: Oh, 

Kenny: they explained to the authorities that they were in fact vampires and would, if released, have no option but to continue to kill people. As they needed to drink blood and then that need was beyond their control.

Supposedly the brothers were tried as serial killers convicted and then eventually executed. 

Garrett: Just imagine with the, they're begging on the spot and they're like, please kill us, please. Just the chief of Police rolls up. Hey Johnson, I need to get the paddy wagon and we're go back over their melons.

Kenny: Oh my gosh. But yeah, so that's supposedly there's no legal records. For this case, but it's like one of the big, like urban legends or myths about like people [00:06:00] drinking blood in New Orleans and it is pretty like crazy, you know? So like two dudes just capturing bitches and then like tying 'em to chairs and shit like you'd see in a horror movie and like drinking blood from their wrists.

Like that's just like, like what? It would make a good movie though, actually. A thriller. 

Garrett: Yeah, it would. All I can think of is that, what the hell was that, that YouTube poop that was going around like in the early two thousands with the guy who was at the McDonald's and then he like saved some, some woman who was like locked up for 10 years in a basement.

Do you know what I'm talking about? 

Kenny: Uh, I think I do, but yeah, I don't re remember exactly. Like what happened? 

Garrett: The neighbor, uh, walk me through again. What happened this afternoon? I knew something was wrong when a little pretty white girl ran into a black man's arms. dead give away. 

Kenny: Dead give away. So what do you think about the, uh, the Carter brothers here who were uh, getting a little, uh, slicey dicey?

Garrett: I would say either one, they are just mentally [00:07:00] disturbed and just, you know, nuts or two, there's actually some spooky woo bullshit. 

Kenny: What if they actually were vampires and then so the city just decided to cover it up, so that's why there's no legal record 

Garrett: possibly. 

Kenny: But it was, it was so crazy that the word still got out.

So while there's no official record, there is the legend of the Carter Brothers. 

Garrett: Yeah. I mean, I heard the story before, even before, uh, you said about recording this episode. 

Kenny: Oh, nice. 

Garrett: Yeah. 

Kenny: So another little, uh, myth or legend here goes back to the 18th century in the early 17 hundreds. And this is the story of the Casket girls.

There was a convent on Cart Street, uh, called the Ursuline Convent, and it's actually the oldest building in the Mississippi River Valley. It, and it was built in 1727. So it was originally a hub for Ursuline nuns from France, and it served as a hospital in a school for young girls. Now it's a museum on, it's a museum on the first floor [00:08:00] with the second housing, some, uh, archives for the archdiocese dating back to 1718.

The third floor, however, is sealed and that's what's remained like a mystery, and that's been fueling speculation about if there's vampires in that convent. In 1728, new Orleans faced a shortage of marriageable women as the city's early settlers were mostly exiled French prisoners. So men outnumbered women five to one.

The city's founder, John Baptiste Lemoine Benville, requested young women from France. 

Garrett: He goes, ah, we need more hoes. Go get some of them freaking, uh, slug eating bitches.

Kenny: So eventually some women came from France to New Orleans and they were called casket girls because they arrived with wooden chest or cassettes that looked like coffins. Uh, carrying their clothes, linens, sometimes they had bridal gowns with them, and they lived at the Ursuline convent until they were married.

So some of [00:09:00] these girls, were they a pale gaunt or they were either like orphans or they were daughters of French families that were meant to populate the colony. But their arrival coincided with mysterious spike in mortality rates, particularly among infants. So suspicion arose when the girls' chests were open and they were found empty.

Rumors swirled that the caskets girls has smuggled vampires from France to New Orleans, hidden in their casket like trunks. The nuns who were alarmed at this move the chests to the convent's attic, sealing the doors and nailing the shutters with 800 Pope Blessed Nails. So they were like just ironing iron nails and was like slamming that shit in.

Mm-hmm. The legend and claims these of vampires possibly young, pale girls posing those brides or the creatures hidden that were hidden in chest still reside in the attic and they emerge at night. So sometimes people reported really see like shutters mysteriously flying open, followed by a strange mist enveloping the convent, the tale of the.

Vampires is probably just an urban legend, but there were actually [00:10:00] casket girls sent to bolster New Orleans population. The big issue is like in real life, I should say, like, uh, their caskets weren't big enough to like actually hold, like a body in, but if you are talking about a supernatural creature, like.

Maybe they can shrink down a little bit to be in a little box. 

Garrett: I forget. What's that? Um, there, there's a folklore with, uh, like demon boxes, like not the, um, Japanese one, but the, uh, like the Catholic one. The Jewish, yeah. Yeah. Or the Jewish one. 

Kenny: Jewish Dybbuk box 

Garrett: Yeah. The Dybbuks 

Kenny: Yeah. That's what supposedly, you know, sealing, a demon inside of a, uh.

Box with some magic, but I think it's, uh, pretty interesting. So supposedly in 19 78, 2 paranormal investigators set up a video camera in front of the convent, and they waited through the night for paranormal activities to see if they can catch it on film. But sometime during the night, the camera stopped filming and the next day they were both found dead on the steps of St.

Mary's Catholic Church next to [00:11:00] the convent. With their throats torn open and their bodies drained of almost all of their blood. The crime, it was a cold case. It's never been solved. If I would say, if it even happened, I guess the, the, you know, it was just a hunting night for the vampire and the guy's like, oh, I don't have to go far.

This, I mean, this is fast food and chomp, chomp 

Garrett: fast food food. 

Kenny: Yeah. They came door DoorDash before DoorDash. It came to them. 

Garrett: Yeah. 

Kenny: What do you think about that? 

Garrett: It's pretty funny. Um, 

Kenny: yeah, there's no, there's no record of that actual, um, murder happening, so at least not that I'm aware of. So I, I think someone just made that to add fuel to the fire with like the whole vampires in the 

Garrett: Yeah, in the convent.

Yeah. I mean, urban legend. People getting bored, wanting to, you know. Entertain themselves. 

Kenny: Mm-hmm. And what I wanna know is how are there even vampires in the convent? 'cause aren't convents considered sanctified ground or so like how do they not just like burst into flames when they go in [00:12:00] there? 

Garrett: Eh, I don't believe it works that way.

I don't know, maybe so. Who knows. Or it could just be that it was all made up. 

Kenny: Yeah, maybe. Maybe. 

Garrett: Or it's because they're, I don't know. Or if they're Roman Catholic. 'cause then they're just, yeah, heretics. 

Kenny: Oh my God. Well, nuns typically are Roman Catholics. I mean, I guess every once in a while. Are there Orthodox nuns?

I don't know. I 

Garrett: don't think so. Congratulations, you played yourself. 

Kenny: The next like big myth or like one of the big myths of the New Orleans vampire lore is Jacques St. Germaine. So in the early 19 hundreds, a mysterious stranger named Jacques St. Germaine arrived in New Orleans and he settled into a lavish home on Royal Street.

He was handsome, wealthy, and charismatic. He quickly became the talk of the town hosting extravagant parties for the city's elite. He was fluent in multiple languages and well traveled. Jacques dazzled with tales of far off places, but shared a little about himself. [00:13:00] His charm was undeniable, but something about him felt kind of off.

So Jacques was rarely seen during the day, and his conversations offered veered into eerie territory. He spoke of historical events. Sometimes centuries old with a familiarity that unsettled listeners he was speaking as as, as if he lived through them. Rumors swirled that he claimed to be a descendant of Comte Saint Germaine, a mysterious 18th century European adventurer node for his ties to King Louis the 15th.

But some notice jocks bore on an uncanny resemblance to the Comte who died in 1718, the Comte de Saint Germaine was no ordinary guy. He was a philosopher, diplomat, and he was rumored to be an alchemist. So he claimed to be hundreds of years old. He had the philosopher 

Garrett: stone that already smoked enough crack that he freaking formaldehyde himself.

Kenny: He did boast to have an elixir of life, so 

Garrett: he's drinking the Adrenochrome 

Kenny: historical [00:14:00] accounts, including one from the famous Casanova described him as a captivating conversationalist who never ate at feasts and he only sipped wine. Jacques shared these quirks hosting decadent parties, but never touching the food.

Only drinking from a chalice. So people were wondering, was jocks not just related to Comte Saint Germaine, but was he comped himself somehow? Now, immortal theories escalated when people noticed jock's ageless appearance mirroring the comps. Portraits where he always looked about 40 years old, the same age as Jacques

Some half jokingly suggested he was a vampire, and it was a rumor that Jacques, he never confirmed, nor denied, seemingly amused by the speculation. Then one night. A woman, uh, who was a prostitute lady of the night, if you will, uh, plummeted from an upper window of Jacque's home. 

Garrett: It's just rainin bitches as it, you know, you should expect at one of his parties.

I'm gonna just imagine this, this is just like a ye old, ye old, uh, Diddy White party. [00:15:00] But instead of like, oh my god, you know the Johnson and Johnson Baby Oil, it goes, break out the whale oil. We're about to play Moby Dick. Oh my God. 

Kenny: Somehow miraculously though, she did survive the fall and she told police a terrifying story.

Garrett: Insert Gibby!!. Oh my 

Kenny: God. So the story she told the police was that Jacques had tried to bite her neck in a panic. She fought him off and jumped to escape. The police skeptical of her claims and charms by Jacques status, asked him to come in for questioning the next morning. He politely agreed, but when morning came, Jacques was gone.

So officers search his phone. Phone officers searched his home and found most of his belongings in tact, along with a grim discovery bottles filled with a mix of wine and human blood. 

Garrett: Now, how'd they know it was human? YYI don't know, man, 

Kenny: but, uh, Jacques St. Germaine had vanished leaving behind a city [00:16:00] buzzing with fear and fascination.

Garrett: Another story I already knew about because when I got got ahold of that Saint Germaine Liquour, the liquid candy, I was like, what the shit is, and I looked it up. I found a story actually. 

Kenny: Yeah. So, uh, St. Germaine is kind of like a, uh, big, like historical, urban, like mythical figure. 

Garrett: Yeah. Kind of just, uh, reoccurs throughout different, uh, people's, uh, writings and all that stuff.

Kenny: Yeah. Some people say, uh uh, so the thing that is like. For him. That's really common throughout all the tales is that he's an alchemist. Some say he's like an alchemist and he's also discovered time travel. Some say he's a, you know, a vampire. Yeah. But others say, you know, he discovered the philosopher stone and that's how he's immortal and he just changes his identity.

Every couple of decades 

Garrett: I would just try to smoke crack in the air fryer and I found a philosopher stone, you know what I'm saying? Just try to cook an eighth in the air fryer. 

Kenny: But, you know, uh, if he, maybe he got a little [00:17:00] too sloppy and that's how that ho escaped and notified the poppo dropping bitches out of a three story window or.

More. I'm not sure where he exactly lived, but, so those are some more, uh, historical tales of vampires in New Orleans. But now there are some people who claim to be vampires today where they identify as vampires. 

Garrett: Oh, as known as the mentally ill. 

Kenny: So there, there are are several people who identify as vampires in New Orleans.

It's not just New Orleans, it's a lot of other big cities. There's like a vampire subculture where there's, uh, Sanguinarians people who actually will drink blood. There's psychic vampires and there's also vampires that kind of feed off of like sexual energy, which is 

Garrett: succubus, incubus, all that kind of jazz.

Kenny: There's a guy who knows by goes by the [00:18:00] name of Belthazaar, Ashton Ashen, or Azar, Ashton Stenson, something like that. He goes by Zaar. 

Garrett: Oh good God, this is lame. Homie was sad in like in high school. Holy shit. 

Kenny: Well, Zaar is the founder of the New Orleans Vampire Association. And they define vampirism as a physiological condition or in the afflicted person's body, either does not make enough of.

Or any, what chromosomes is like enough of, oh, uh, the, uh, uh, the daily essential energy is necessary into, in order to perform daily tasks. 

Garrett: So what he needs to like, smoke a rock and then, you know, get off his ass or just like, what does he mean? Like, 

Kenny: like the, so like, uh, they need the, the energy of other people to feel, uh, normal or like, have energy.

So like, so he is a narcissist. Some people. Oh my [00:19:00] God. So some people, uh, say that when they actually drink blood, uh, they, it's like they're, they get like a huge influx of energy and they can feel normal for a while. Uh, that's called HPV, 

Garrett: my guy. Oh my God. 

Kenny: Some people say they need to like absorb other psychic energy to feel.

Oh, so you're normal. 

Garrett: You're the annoying cocksucker at work. He always has to be negative. It's that guy at work. Oh, something happened with my vehicle, man, you just got the worst luck. I mean, this always happens to you, man. You just, you just don't catch a break 

Kenny: Oh my gosh. But those are the like kind of types, so there's like people who drink blood, people who, who absorb psychic energy and people who may absorb sexual energy.

So yeah, it's um. There it is. Supposedly the community is, uh, diverse. There's like a lot of different people in [00:20:00] it. Um, some people do get like fake fangs fitted to it. So 'cause it helps them feel more with their identity as a vampire. 

Garrett: So like how the, uh, how the them, uh, um, fur s be doing with the tails. 

Kenny: So there's also a guy by the name of Maven Lore.

Who is, uh, a leader in the Vampire Court? 

Garrett: Oh, good god, man. You can tell they're, I'm, be like, wow, they were creative with their name, but holy shit. I mean, this is, uh, I, I like Castlevania and it's, it's deep. 

Kenny: Uh, a lot of this seems to be for like, um, people trying to find like a community they have along with. And they all come.

Losers. 

Garrett: Losers, 

Kenny: man. No sympathy from you today, huh? 

Garrett: No, we need bring back bullying, make people normal. 

Kenny: Oh my God. But he said that, um, a lot of people do consume blood from consenting [00:21:00] donors, typically loved ones or partners in small amounts. So some people say they like to do like a small incision on some their back, and then like they, you know, drink blood from it and then put a bandage over the, uh, the cut.

Some people say they only do maybe only drink blood once or maybe twice a week. So it's not like a lot. 

Garrett: So the, the mentally ill and they're desperately codependent, uh, possibly abused, uh, spouses. 

Kenny: Uh, maybe, 

Garrett: maybe. But, uh, um hmm. 

Kenny: Yes. 

Garrett: The, the, Hmm was, uh, I don't think it's a maybe, 

Kenny: but he said a lot of these people, you know, were, have normal day jobs.

Uh, so like Lore is a graphic designer 

Garrett: at the freaking blockbuster, you know, just, oh my God, you just down there by day and night. That, that's when he, uh, you know, he dawns his cap and cape 

Kenny: cap and cape. There was a ethnographer by the name [00:22:00] of, um, an A What ethnographer And what does that entail? It's like studies, they like study, like cultures and ethnicities and stuff.

Garrett: Uh, that, that is a, that is a new one for me, dog. 

Kenny: But, uh, I think his name was John Edward Browning and he said that he was actually surprised to. Talking to some of these people who identify as vampires, and he said they're uh, no more crazy than the average Joe. 

Garrett: Excuse me. These, sum bitches are cutting bitches and sucking on the blood 

Kenny: as one does.

Garrett: Yeah. I'm not just gonna roll down to the, any of my coworkers and be like, yeah, it is normal. Right. You know, when you, when your bitch wants to cut you and then scrape and lick. 

Kenny: Scrape and lick. 

Garrett: This is just Tuesday for y'all. 

Kenny: Oh, sorry. It was John Edgar Browning, not Edward Browning. 

Garrett: I really didn't care for the clarification.

I mean, I don't exactly hold much, uh, stock in this man's ideas because he is like, ah, they're just as regular as [00:23:00] everybody else. Uh, no. I, now I'm concerned about you, dude. What do you do on a Saturday night? He's over there freaking David Carradine'ing himself. I guarantee it. 

Kenny: Oh my God. But he said, so some of, of like the people who in the vampire community, they're kind of just goths.

They wear like gothic dress and they have pro uh, prosthetic fangs, though a lot of people in the vampire community term, those lifestylers. Real vampires actually, uh, drink blood or use, uh, psychic energy, and they're kind of dependent on it. Oh, 

Garrett: they're just posers instantly. It takes like a nice long puff off a clove cigarette.

Kenny: Oh my gosh. But a lot of people, uh, he says like the vam modern vampire community didn't really arrive until the, like the late 1990s when. There was like vampire message boards and then so people started to like out, yeah, because these people weren't getting, 

Garrett: getting bullied because they had, they found somewhere private to have these dumb ass [00:24:00] ideas.

Like, oh boy. It's like nobody was out there drinking blood and wearing latex until we got the internet. All I'm saying, 

Kenny: oh my, well, uh, maybe they were wearing latex and doing that for different reasons, just saying. Uh, I don't know. Like I, it is a little odd, 

Garrett: a little you don't 

say? 

Kenny: anyway. Um. Let's get to a story of an eyewitness encounter with a potential vampire.

So this was an account that happened some time ago in New Orleans, in the French Quarter. Again, that seems to be where a lot of this stuff takes place. Mm-hmm. So my now deceased ex had an affinity for New Orleans. I haven't been back since his death. Not that I didn't share some of his strange fixation with the city.

But I've had too many strange encounters here, and honestly, I don't feel safe. Going back. The night of the encounter, we hadn't been drinking at [00:25:00] all, so that needs to be clear with the location. He was a big guy, six four, pretty muscular, and we were just taking a stroll after the streets started to quiet down.

I remember everything being a normal walk until after we passed the Ursuline convent heading back towards the river. I am normally spot on with my directions, but something about NOLA makes me lose my bearings and I rely on landmarks. Just after we crossed the street, leaving the corner of the convent behind us, I noticed it became eerily quiet, not something that happens there, especially as people stumble to their hotels.

He also noticed something because he gripped my hand quite hard and picked up the pace. He had a strange look to his face, uh, as I struggled to keep up, and he was taking odd routes. Finally I caught what was making him act bizarre. I followed a split second glance of his to a building. The best I could say is it looked like a dingy, pale Spider-Man going up the side of a building 

Garrett: It's a crack head in a trench coat.

Kenny: I [00:26:00] remember him harshly, whispering not to look, to just keep moving. He was taking us to Bourbon Street where there would hopefully be more people, but this was off season in midweek, so there were less people. And even less than I would've expected time steamed to stand, eerily still as if time had stopped except for us.

And it, I looked about two blocks later and it was on the roof. Clearly tracking something that I prayed was not us. The silence was truly deafening, and I think I tuned out more sounds, trying to escape being prey. This thin humanoid, which was defying gravity, freaked us out bad. We made it to the hotel with my last memory of a glide being.

Just before the house where sup, where supposed vampires brothers lived and disappeared from, I think it was the most harrowing experience I've had ever had. And there's been a few close calls in my life. I know it's like a quirky city with plenty of the fantastical, but this was like we were in another [00:27:00] dimension that was the French Quarter send sending us to, and to this day it was still frightening to me.

We were completely sober and just out for a romantic stroll. In a city. We had a connection with that thing. I can't escape it. Even over time, my boyfriend has said little about it. He was even more disturbed by this than I was. He refused to say anything other than corroborating what I saw and that it was going on longer than I knew it come from a house away from us when he first noticed it.

It's worth noting that before this, we had gone to listen to Johnny Gordon at lats. We drank regular soda. I needed to tie my shoe right across the street and something bit his leg. Uh, he had two decent puncture wounds, maybe a half an inch apart on his calf. We brushed it off as maybe he bumped into something and we didn't notice.

Then took our stroll. There are deep though to not notice, but whatever it was, it left. No strange overtones to us. The [00:28:00] city streets took on a weird vibe that night, to be honest. It left a spooky shadow over all my memories of our beloved quarter. He's not around for me to ask anymore, so I'm asking if any of you have encountered anything like this here too.

Later. The, the witness stated that we were about the puncture wounds. We were honestly never able to get any concrete diagnosis, and there were, uh, some extensive tests done with visits to specialists. He was only 37. Started with fatigue. And heart palpitations and edema in his calf to the point of actually convincing him to go to the doctor.

Uh, and I wanted to say that was within six to eight months after this occurrence, he just passed away shy three years ago. We used to go out there so often that it became more feasible to have our own place there as it was every two to three weeks out there for a long weekend. I think I said though, this was pretty much our last time there and may have been.

There may have been one trip to gather our things out of the home, so I don't know, like if he got like bit by something or crack hit [00:29:00] in a storm drain. 

Garrett: Yep. He popped his little noggin out and bit him on the ankle, 

Kenny: right? Yeah. Look, could you imagine like, you know, you're going, you're, you're walking down the street and like you look up and there's something crawling on the side of the buildings and on the rooftops like stalking your ass.

Like, holy shit. 

Garrett: Are you being chased by a pale fentanyl Ferret? You too may be in the twilight zone, 

Kenny: pale fentanyl, ferret. Oh my god. I don't know, man. If it was a fent ferret, you think he, I don't know if he'd have the ability to climb up and down walls. 

Garrett: I don't know, man. You take one rip off the fent pen and your, your ass is, uh, your center of gravity, ghost your heels.

So he, he could just walk up and he's flatfooted like magnetism maybe. Magnetism. Yeah. Fentanyl induced magnetism 

Kenny: sticks to walls and then he can just somehow fent supernaturally affects gravity. He can just glide down off the rooftop. 

Garrett: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 

Kenny: Uh, [00:30:00] don't do fent kids. It doesn't actually make you climb a buildings, but you will feel like you could do a back flip.

Oh my God. Okay, so let's now go into like a little story that kind of shows kind of what the belief around vampires is for some people in New Orleans. So this is what a story that someone posted to Reddit on the Vampire sub Reddit, uh, user, beach Gal 7 7 2 0 0 0 0. Their story. So, and this will be linked down in the show notes, so you can go read it yourself.

First off, I'm a white married, I think I was 42 at the time. I'm 46 now, woman. Uh, now I know the rules of the quarter. Don't go out alone at night. Stay in twos and threes. Don't walk alone, period. But especially in dark places during Mardi Gras. But I don't know. It was unusually cold. I was with my mom and future stepdad and they didn't want to go anywhere.

So I put on my black ripped up jeans, kneehigh leather boots. I had a [00:31:00] rhinestone deep purple corset and a long black jacket sort of matrix-like I don't normally dress that way, but it was getting crazy, heading towards Fat Tuesday. So people dress in all sorts of costumes. This was the Friday night before.

Oh, and my hair is long, like, very long and blonde. I had it, uh, curled. I had my cat's eyes eyeliner lined, uh, sparkly. Mardi Gras type makeup, dark lips. I got already and left. My mom, who was asleep, woke up long enough to tell me to pick up some sweet tea if I could find it. I wanted to walk down Bourbon Street alone.

It was massively packed. Our hotel was off Royal Street, so I had, it was one block over. I put my money in hotel card in my bra so I didn't have to worry about pickpockets, and then I walked through the tightest crowd of people. I felt sort of terrified and alive at the same time. Not from scary people.

I'm just really claustrophobic. I got past a huge pack of people and beads being thrown and walked around the block and back onto Royal Street. And I could see a guy playing a guitar a block and a half [00:32:00] away, and it was well lit. It was somewhat where I was walking, and I could see tourists stay with me on this.

I have a, a point, uh, when I walked my jacket smooshed up in the wind for a minute. I did feel empowered. I walked alone at night and, uh, I walked alone at night in Nola and lived to tell his tale. But honestly, it's not that hard because I didn't know much as I I know now. I smiled because I could hear the guitar playing and I could see my hotel and I was almost, back then, to my surprise, a pack of like eight to 10 men came around the corner walking towards me.

I. Now I am not racist. I wasn't even, 

Garrett: I'm not racist, but insert racist statement. 

Kenny: But until two people behind me raced to the other side of the road anyway, um, two other people raced to the other side of the road. Then I started listening to what some, they were mumbling, some shouting. We going to kill us a few tonight.

Some girl's gonna see their last tonight. Yes. Slid a few. Yeah. They, they last after. As I'm listening, I'm [00:33:00] thinking, I'm like, maybe they're talking about drinking, smoking, bar hopping, strip clubs, but then I saw one had a baseball bat. Uh, there was a few knives, a gun or two inside the jackets. I could have been wrong, but I can tell you it's what it's, that's what it looked like.

Garrett: I could have been wrong, but I'm pretty sure they were gangsters. 

Kenny: So now. I'm screwed. They're so close to me. Only prey runs and I'm no Karen, so they just boys. Hanging out. Hanging out for Mardi Gras. I told my soul, I told myself, I kept my look on my face calm. I made sure to look chill. Not an overly excited Taurus.

Not a dumb ass, not a Karen. Just a random blonde chick walking alone. I didn't smile. I looked straight ahead and as we walked to towards each other and basically I walked through them, their weird comments stopped and none of them touched me. In fact, I felt they like pulled away a little, but surely not.

I'm a defenseless 42-year-old white chick. Seriously, an idiot for being out here alone in the first place. I made it through [00:34:00] all of them, but one, and he bumped into my shoulder. My face had already passed his, I closed my eyes and slowed down my steps. Why? I cannot tell you, but I heard him scream out.

Miss. Oh, miss, I'm so, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Forgive me, please. I turned my upward body around and mid stepped, just nodded my head and kept walking toward, uh, the light in the guitar player. I heard the boy scream out to me. One more time, please. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to, I really didn't. I knew he didn't mean to.

Okay. But I'm like, what the actual f But who does he think I am? The guy didn't sound like he was being sarcastic. He sounded truly terrified like I was going to attack him or something. He couldn't have been no more than 20 close to my daughter's age. It was madness. Why would he be scared of me? I'm about as scary as a freaking kitten.

I heard a few of the other guys say, better sleep with one eye open, bro. Watch them windows. Better get some garlic. Man. Stay outta the city tonight. Um, what now? I ain't scary looking. By no means I looked like a sparkling [00:35:00] bright hippie or happy blonde. I just happened to have on a long black trench coat and long boots because it was cold.

I've seen people in way more goth clothes than what I was wearing. I sat there and pondered that after making it to the front of my hotel. Then I remember my mom wanted a tea, so I knew Popeye's was open on Canal. So I decided to go get some chicken and tea. It's like 3:00 AM at this point. And I was standing in line and someone said, loved your costume.

Vampire. I'm what? I waited a long time for food because the drunk and hungover folks rolled in at the same time. I did the fear in that boy's voice would not leave my mind. Who did he think I was? He barely bumped into my shoulder, and these were extremely buff strong. 18 to 25-year-old dudes. No way. He was worried about hitting someone, sitting someone's on the shoulder, at least of all mine.

It reminded me of being in a haunted house and the way people would, would react or or speak. Sounds nervous and jittery as they walk through the haunted house. Shit, that probably doesn't make sense. [00:36:00] Anyway, the second isn't, thing isn't that big of a deal, but it's still crazy. So I'm in a crew and I was sitting next to a girl on our parade float.

I don't know her. I was making conversation and cutting up with her. I love meeting new people. The parade was at a standstill and most of the streets leading to where the parade starts. I have no idea where I am and out of nowhere, she says That's supposedly a real vampire house, not the cosplay ones, not the human ones who drink it for kicks.

The real ones hanging out there. I looked at her kind of strangely because that was outta nowhere, and I had never said anything about my interest in the culture. I didn't ask a lot of questions. I just said, fascinating. You just never know. In this town, I made a mental note to forget where it was on purpose.

It struck me as an odd thing to say outta nowhere. I'm fascinated by Nola and I believe it holds so many mysteries, but no, don't ask. I have no idea which one it was. It was boarded up and dark. I just changed the subject. If there are real ones, I respect their privacy and the culture in general. [00:37:00] Why it does it fascinate me, so I'm not sure, but.

It intrigues me completely, so that's pretty interesting. Do people actually, do, some people actually believe in vampires? So much there that they thought this one goth bitch was actually a vampire walking down the street and that 

Garrett: that were, the fact that she was like in her forties and still dressing like that.

Maybe that's what horrified 'em. Maybe they thought she was a creepy lot lizard. 

Kenny: Oh my God. If that's true. Like they were like, they had like a ball bat and knives and a couple guns, and they were saying like, we going to kill some bitches like. Uh, and they just let this lady just walk on through 'em and they thought she was like, damn vampire.

Like, what? I did see some posts on X, like there was, um, vague reports. It was like some vampire encounters. Like there was this video of like this people in a club, [00:38:00] right? And like there was this, uh, these two women dancing and like, this dude just kind of like. It is like stands right there and he has like this weird ass expression on his face.

He's like, there, you're like flat. He's just kind of like moving a little bit, but like not really dancing. But the weird thing was his eyes were like, had this weird shine to them, like they're kind of glowing, like an ambery color. 

Garrett: Creepy dude. Little contacts. 

Kenny: Yeah, I'm like, it it, I don't know. Do they have like reflective contacts for like, so that your iris kind of glows?

Garrett: I mean, probably 

Kenny: was this dude just, I don't know, coked out or on a bunch of Molly and he was, or like, I wanna come down or something. And he was just like, uh, and this just like happened to be standing there. 

Garrett: Creepy, uh, golf, uh, deviant guy. Nightclub. Probably drugs. Also, probably a bit of a sociopathic narcissism.

Kenny: This guy, uh, he wasn't like a goth guy though. He was just like, okay, it's kinda like olive [00:39:00] complected and wearing like a button up shirt and 

Garrett: still maybe just like a drugged out sociopath. 

Kenny: That's still possible. 

Garrett: Maybe a, but 

Kenny: it was kind of weird. I 

Garrett: mean, 

Kenny: his eyes glowing. It was kind of weird. 

Garrett: Uh, okay, well, I can't really say anything about that.

I don't really know, uh, an excuse for glowing eyeballs, but, uh, may, uh, drugged out, uh, rapey dude. 

Kenny: Yeah, that's definitely possible. So I think there's a lot of neat stuff in New Orleans. Surrounding vampires and fun stories like The myths were, are pretty cool. Like the Carter Brothers. That could be like, you could turn that into a pretty cool movie.

Garrett: Yeah, that'd be dope. I think 

Kenny: maybe you could maybe even make a, a movie with like the Casket Girls or St. Germaine as well and you can get kind of like goofy with it, you know? Yeah, I could 

Garrett: definitely see like a series about St. Germaine or something like that. 

Kenny: Yeah, 

Garrett: I could you see it being like a goofy ass comedy or a actually like.

Ooh. Spooky bullshit kind of show. 

Kenny: Yeah, like an actual, like supernatural thriller. 

Garrett: Yeah. 

Kenny: [00:40:00] Kind of like Salem's lot except set in New Orleans. That'd be pretty cool. Mm-hmm. 

Garrett: Lemme do. 

Kenny: Now, in regards to the modern vampire subculture, that's just strange to me. 

Garrett: Very. 

Kenny: But you know, as long as it's between consenting adults, you do, you 

Garrett: bring back bullying.

Kenny: Oh my God. And then the encounter with the pale humanoid climbing up the side of the building and stalking that couple, that was, that was interesting to me. I'd, I wish there was more detail in that story. Like, and why did that guy, why did he die later? Did he like, I think it was like several years later, but still like, did he get like nipped at, you know, crossing the sewer main from a vampire and like.

It marked them and he got some kind of weird vampire. 

Garrett: He got, he got the vamp aids. 

Kenny: But, uh, I think, I just think that's interesting and I think there's a lot of, it's probably pretty fun to do one of [00:41:00] those paranormal tours and just feel like you're in like a really spooky area. How many of actual vampires there are, or do vampires even exist?

I don't 

Garrett: know. Insert boomer humor. Well, my ex-wife was a hell of a blood sucker. My 

Kenny: God. So anyway, if you've enjoyed listening to this episode of Enter the Rift podcast, please like, subscribe, share it with your friends, and don't get eaten by some fent out fent ferret, 

Garrett: yeah, in 

Kenny: the French Quarter. And 

Garrett: keep that clove of garlic close.

[00:42:00] Peace.