Gnome Sightings

Kenny: [00:00:00] Hello everybody and welcome back to Enter the Rift podcast. I'm your host, Kenny, joining my co-host Garrett Yo. And today on this episode, the season finale of season two, we are going to get ged. We're gonna talk about the gnomes, not those little, uh, ones that you have in your garden. These ones may drive little cars and also try to lure children into attics.

So yeah, gnomes, what are they? 

Garrett: Pointy, yes. 

Kenny: But yeah, so you know, things that are like a typically more associated with like a lot of the fairy folklore. Some of them are described as what your typical looking like garden g Nome, like usually they're like little. Two, maybe three feet tall at the max, like usually male with like a white beard and like a red pointed hat.

It doesn't always have to be red, but sometimes it's brown, [00:01:00] sometimes it's blue. Usually have kind of like wrinkly skin. It ranges from them being mischievous or helpful to people to straight up like evil and malicious. And it really just depends on how you find yourself meeting them at the moment. 

Garrett: Yeah, don't touch thier stuff basically is the general rule, isn't it?

Kenny: Yeah. You don't wanna, um, like mess with their stuff. You don't want to insult them. 

Garrett: Basically. Treat 'em like autistic people, but smaller. 

Kenny: Oh my God. 

Garrett: Something like that. Don't provoke them and you're good. 

Kenny: Yeah. 

Garrett: If not, they'll screech and start, um, flailing around on you. 

Kenny: Or if you insult them and they don't really, they don't like it, they will just make you pass out.

I. So if we go to a story here, this happened somewhere in Kentucky. So on the site, Phantoms and Monsters, a user, uh, submitted a story to Lon. Here's the following account. Hi, [00:02:00] my boyfriend told me a story of the gnome man. He and his friend sa. He was walking with his his four friends One of them was a girl and the rest were guys.

So the five of them are out in Kentucky and chilling in a small patch of woods in Newport, near Marydale. 

Oh yeah you got any of them. Newports. 

They sit down. Let me get a carton You know, and all of a sudden they feel this change in the air and the girl just says, there is something around us, but it's weak. They look over at her and then boom, the gnome manifests, and he looks upset.

She looks over and he points at her and snaps his fingers. She instantly passes out. The guys grabbed her and tried to drag her out of the woods, and she didn't fully come to until they were out on the street. All he did was snap his fingers at her. I think the vibe was that he was upset. She called him weak.

That's rude. Anyway, 

Garrett: this little shithead popped up, Ze snapped and the hoe passed out. 

Kenny: [00:03:00] Yep, 

Garrett: yep. Little man got insulted, popped up. Bitch. 

Kenny: See, this is why you don't wanna piss 'em off. They'll just like appear out of nowhere. They'll de cloak anyway and they'll cast sleep on your ass and you're just go, you're just gonna drop.

Garrett: Yeah. He'll hit you with that freaking celestial melatonin real quick. 

Kenny: So yeah, that's just a part of a little story. Um, the rest of the account goes, I definitely don't feel the energy and randomly insult them. I always respect nature spirits as that, as their domain. Uh, my boyfriend and his other friends are like me too.

Nature freaks at leave offerings in their favorite spots. That girl never stuck around after that. I don't blame her, but damn. That means there are gnomes in Kentucky.

Garrett: But damn, that means there's gnomes in Kentucky. This is the most wh shit ever. It popped up. Z snapp. It's funny though. Damn. God dang it. We got gnomes. 

Kenny: I just imagine a [00:04:00] little gnome that's dressed like a pimp named slick back. And he just snaps at a hoe and she goes out. But yeah, a lot of people think that like gnomes are like nature spirits and like they're connected to like the Fae or fairies.

Other people say that gnomes are like low level demons and that they're evil entity. Trying to like, either just cause mischief to be a general like nuisance or like actually like, cause harm to people. It's 

Garrett: like basically an imp 

Kenny: Kind of, they kind of take, can take that, uh, that form. There's a lot of like gnome lore, but, uh, I 

Garrett: Oh yeah.

Breaking out the gnome lore. Gnome 

Kenny: lore, 

Garrett: yeah. 

Kenny: But I think in, uh, in this episode here, we're, we're just gonna kind of talk about some weird stories and happenings here. So if we go. To another, uh, story here. [00:05:00] This one's from a mushroom hunter. So a lot of these stories take place. 

Garrett: Homies out there tripping balls on the toad stools and a little midget, a pointy hat came up and gave 'em a couple gifts, 

Kenny: right?

A lot of these happen typically outdoors here in a little bit, though we will get into some that happened actually in people's houses too. I will be the first to admit, I thought these types of sightings were a joke and not real, and I've never been able to take them seriously. I am an outdoorsman and have been for 35 years.

I grew up in the woods. I memorized trees for mushroom hunting for a living. I know every brook stream, bush, berry grove log, you name it. Because of this, I want to keep my location private. I'm on a forested road and there's not a soul on site. I'm gathering some mushrooms and look up the road, and I see a rock has fallen from the loose, steep side of the mountain to the middle of the road.

I mentally note that I have to move it and not drive over it. I gather my mushrooms and get back to the [00:06:00] car. I looked up and I saw what happened to be a two or two and a half foot tall little brown thing walking from the side of the road over to the rock. My first logical thought is that it's a squirrel, but I see it's walking on two legs.

Appears to be wearing brown cloth or forer clothes, and it's shaped like a human, but very tiny. And it's not scurrying either. It, it is ambling on two legs. Like a human would just casually walking like this is some normal, regular thing, like the monotonous work it does for a living. I couldn't believe my lying eyes.

It has to be something else. I get back in the car and hit up the road and see what that, the rock has been pushed back to the side of the road from Winston came, it had fallen off the hill, rode to my left, and then was sitting back on the other side of the road. On the right there are drag marks, like someone slid it back.

I look, I smell, I sense, I listen, nothing. I don't know where gnomes live, but the old partially logged section where I was looked pretty [00:07:00] perfect for a clan of these things. Lots of places to hide, secluded near water, plenty of routes of escape, and it would be easy to dig little holes in the mountain and be fortified against invaders.

The side road into it was flooded and appears. To do so regularly, so these little guys even have their own little moat. I'm positive I'm overthinking this. It was a long drive back up the mountain, then down the mountain the other way, and sometimes home. And I can't pick this apart into anything else but it being a tiny little forest man, I'm a thousand percent positive.

I saw what I saw. It was near a military special interest zone, allegedly blocked off due to some native butterflies. But I'm starting to wonder if this research area is really about is not, is if it's really about butterflies. After all they send you to prison, ban you from parks and give you a $5,000 fine if you take a single berry from inside that boundary.[00:08:00] 

So this dude just saw like a two foot tall, little, uh, 

Garrett: homey meant the Lorax 

Kenny: right? Yeah. And maybe there's this, uh, military zone there because the gnome king made a contract with the United States military to give them protection, and that's why you can't take a berry out of that spot. 

Garrett: That is, that is one of the sentences in history.

Kenny: Yes. Yes, it is. 

Garrett: It, it's got a lot going on. I'm, I'm, I'm not gonna just immediately just be like, uh. Jumping on it for its, uh, theatrical ness. We'll, we'll put it like that. Theatrical ness. 

Kenny: I dunno. I think it's kind of neat. At least, you know, the guy was just like, looked up and 

Garrett: I know, but it, it, it reads like a, uh, like a, kind of like a coming of age story circa 1980 something like a ET situation.

I stumbled upon these little guys, but the military's out to get 'em. 

Kenny: I don't think they're out the [00:09:00] gettem or keep 'em safe. 

Garrett: Yeah. Or whatever. Keep them safe. The military's hiding the little dudes 

Kenny: because they made a pact with the gnome king man. So they have to Yeah. Enforce the law. 

Garrett: Oh man. This is some, uh, some, yeah, definitely is like some Disney, uh, TV shit.

Kenny: Uh, a cw that, that's what it would be. That's what networking would be. Or channel it would be on cw. 

Garrett: Oh, yeah.

Kenny: Anyway, I think that was a fun little story. Now we'll get some little gnomes and go beep beep. And by beep beep, I mean they're honking a tiny little car horn. So this is the story of the Walton Park gnomes. So this is a pretty famous incident that happened regarding gnomes, and this took place in the in Wellington Park in Nottingham in 1979.

So a small group of children were wandering the park early one evening and just kind of playing, you know, [00:10:00] doing what kids do. And then they were surprised when they were being, they all of a sudden were being chased by gnomes and tiny little motor cars. So the children reported that there were about 30 cars each with two gnomes in the car.

They made no like engine noise, but they had a, a, a button and it had like a little bell instead of a horn. So think like a little, uh, like bicycle bell and Okay. Tri, they had, uh, triangular ish headlights and the gnomes leaned the steer them. One child reported they had no steering wheel, just a round thing that turned with a handle on it, and the cars would also jump over logs.

So they were, yeah, so a little hoard of gnomes having a little rally car race. Were chasing a group of children in a park. 

Garrett: So the g No, this is, um, yeah. Okay. [00:11:00] Moving on. 

Kenny: Yeah. Uh, the gnomes were described by one child was about half the size of me, and they had long white beards with a red, red at the bottom, and they had little white and red cars, and they were chasing us.

Another child described the beards as long and black. They wore tights instead of trousers, and some were torn with yellow patches. They had blues hops on and a green cap with a big bobble. At the end. The all their gnomes had old, wrinkled faces and were friendly, and they laughed joyfully. One child said they didn't talk.

Another said they shouted at each other, but not in the language he could understand. Then one child said he could see them clearly as there was a light hanging in the trees. 

Garrett: A what? 

Kenny: Yeah. So a little bit of some variance in the story. 

Garrett: Yeah. I, I, I'm, I'm gonna chalk this up to, uh, kids in their imagination and probably that, just about that 

Kenny: maybe.

They said [00:12:00] that they were chasing them and the kids ran out of the gates of the park, but the gnomes didn't follow them out. 

Garrett: Was it possibly some teenagers in some remote controlled cars? 

Kenny: I don't, there's no, I don't think so. 

Garrett: Not gonna lie, dude, this one's pretty hard to rift on because it's so, um, wacky as shit.

Kenny: Yeah, it's, it's really weird. Apparently there have been other. Mentions a fairy folk in Walton Park and Marjorie Johnson seeing theories. There was an account given to her by Mrs. C George in the year 1900 was passing the gates at the park when she saw little men dressed like policemen standing inside the large entrance.

They were smiling and looked very happy. They were about two to three feet tall, and she mentioned that the ferries were seen dancing around the lake in the park. So, I don't know, this just seems like a place where, like in Wallington where, um, 

Garrett: sounds like the old woman was, you know, hitting the, hitting a laden back a little, a little hard.

[00:13:00] Too much there. Uh, yeah. 

Kenny: But, uh, I don't know. So I'm not entirely sure what's going on there, but, uh. I mean, it is in the, um, the UK maybe 

Garrett: possibly an old woman saw kids playing in costumes and was like, 

Kenny: they're, they're cops, but they're little and they're dancing. I mean, but yeah, I don't know what kind of weirdness is going on in, uh, Wallace's in park, but apparently maybe every, uh, 70 some years, you can run into gnomes there, 

Garrett: or perhaps a gaggle of midgets on go-karts.

Kenny: Oh my God. Moving back over to the United States. So in the Hudson Valley in New York, there was a, a storm going on. So a guy by the name of Dave Barlow, uh, reported this when he was, um, 10 years old. And this happened in New York State's, Hudson Valley. So there [00:14:00] was a thunderstorm going on and lightning flashes like lighting up his bedroom.

And while he was laying on his bed on the first floor, he realized that there was something standing outside his window. So he said, with the wind, there came this other sound and it made, uh, goosebumps race all over his body. It was on an ungodly, howling and wailing. It didn't, couldn't have come from human lips.

No animal I knew could wail like that. The noise from what Barlow later called the howler, drove him out of bed, sending him down the hall to his grandmother's bedroom. He climbed into the bed next to her. What is that grandma? He asked. Barlow's grandmother said the noise was just the wind and, but he said, I knew it wasn't just the wind and I, and I knew she knew it wasn't the wind.

The wailing came around the house closer to him. His grandma put an arm around me. He said, grandma put an arm around me and held me tight. The howling was right outside. Her window is a few feet away from us and I [00:15:00] buried my face in her shoulder. The sound finally died and the storm and Barlow, Dr. Uh, finally fell asleep.

When he woke up. Sunlight was streaming through the window and his grandmother was gone. He found her outside with a mop and a bucket cleaning the front porch. He said, I could see what my grandma was cleaning. There were money for Grandma went 

Garrett: John Wick on the Gnomes Man. 

Kenny: He said there were muddy footprints all over the floor, and the muddy footprints were small like lozo, a toddler.

They were teeny tiny little footprints. Barlow said, I got goosebumps again. I asked Grandma what made the footprints. She just didn't answer and kept cleaning. The Mohegan, uh, PECO, uh, Mohawk and Iroquois tribes that lived all around the, the area said they all have le legends of little people and some of them.

Are tricksters that are associated with storms. So maybe she, maybe this guy had a, uh, an encounter with one of [00:16:00] those little tricksters during a thunderstorm and left little evidence of having tiny little footprints on the porch. 

Garrett: Well, you then, and in that case, you know, you go down there to, to sheets.

You go get you a, a little bottle of bootlegger and some American spirits, and you lay it out for him. He'll leave you alone next time. 

Kenny: People do leave little offerings and stuff to like fairies and stuff. So like, tobacco is actually like a common one. Uh, people leave out like milk or butter cookies, that kind of stuff.

Uh, a lot of people also leave like little things on like whiskey. Okay. So now moving across to the other side of the country takes place near Porterville, California. So a woman by the name of Tammy moved herself and her three children to a country house by the Toole River near Porterville, California, and she didn't know something wicked was waiting for them.

We always got the [00:17:00] feeling of being watched. She said one spot on the farm especially put her on edge, and that was the barn. The family, animals, uh, dogs, a cat, turkeys, chickens and ducks avoided that building. We had a lot more chickens and ducks, but they started disappearing. I also noticed that none of the neighbor's, animals, or stray animals, for that matter, would go anywhere near the barn.

It was, without a doubt, just creepy. She soon discovered why. So one evening, my son, who was seven years old at the time, and I had just come back from grocery shopping, we parked and got out of the car, and as I was opening up the back to get the groceries out, I noticed the movement out of the quarter of my eye.

I lifted a grocery sack from the car and I saw the movement again. This time I heard a very freaky, very evil sounding chuckle. I looked in the direction of the sound and they were standing about 50 yards from my son and I was, what I can really describe as a gnome. The creature was about two to three feet [00:18:00] tall, wore baggy black pants, and a gold colored shirt.

A salt and pepper beard ran from beneath a red pointed hat. That thing grinned at us and the creepy grin spread from ear to ear. 

Garrett: So did they see an evil gnome or just like a Latin king gang member who happened to be a little, uh, vertically challenged? 

Kenny: Oh my gosh. Its teeth were a gross brown and pointed or jagged.

It had a very bulbous nose and large deep set eyes. So she dropped the groceries and she grabbed her son, and when this happened, the little wicked man cackling after her. She ran into the, so this thing chased her to the house. Tammy burst inside through the kitchen and slammed the door shut as she tried to tell her daughters about her panic.

Something moved outside the kitchen window. She looked and saw the top of the things, red pointed hat, and it had, at this point, it had to be about 10 feet off the ground. The thing eventually disappeared from the window, and Tammy retrieved the groceries from the car [00:19:00] and she never saw it again. But until the day she moved, she heard the gnomes creepy chuckle coming from the old barn.

Garrett: I, I can still just like, all I can picture it as is like that little dude from smiling friends. Just, what are you doing in my head? Get outta my head man. Get outta my head. I'm freaking running up at him. Just chicken putto. We just, just sprinting out like a little like creepy little stop motion guy.

Kenny: That'd be creepy. Uh, but apparently later, so somebody else moved into that house in 2010. Uh, so this is Char from Charlie. So I guess ta Tammy moved, but some, somebody else moved into their house and they encountered this thing as well. So in March of 2010, they said the house was perfect for us, exactly what we were looking for, and we couldn't wait to move in.

There were free red rooms, a huge kitchen, dining room, and living room, and lots of windows. The deck that opened off the back door overlooked the woods in the nearby tool River. A deck in the front overlooked a pond. [00:20:00] Uh, Charlie placed fairy gnome and totto yard ornaments around the pond and stack it with Japanese koi fish to make it feel like their home.

But that feeling wouldn't last one day while walking back from the river to the house with her daughters and their dogs, the dogs became riled as they approached a rickety outbuilding. Charlie called the shack. The dogs began to snarl and bark the hair and their back standing up. Something told me to run.

So I grabbed a twin under each arm and ran for home. Something about that shack gave me the creeps, especially at night, but I don't know why she began to notice none of the animals, not even wildlife or stray cats, would go near shack until the day she heard the fight coming from inside. It sounded like a cat was in a fight with something way bigger than it was, so her husband grabbed a flashlight and ran to the shed.

Just as he got to the door, the noise stopped. He went in and looked around with a flashlight and there was a cat. It was totally skinned on one side and its neck looked [00:21:00] as though it had, uh, something had taken a chunk out of it. He stepped outside the shack to catch his breath, and when he looked back in, the cat was gone.

There was no way the cat moved by itself. We were standing right there. So where did the cat go? Later on one night, around 3:00 AM a raspy gurgling singing. Woke up Charlie and her husband from their sleep. It was without a doubt the most hideous sound I have ever heard. She said It really freaked us out.

Charlie and her husband looked out their bedroom window and saw something that they said challenged their sanity. Standing by my pond holding one of my garden gnomes was what I can only describe as something that looked out of a grims fairytale. That thing was standing in our yard and it was hideous and grotesque.

A human-like creature stood under the bright light of the motion detector. It was two to three feet tall with a long gray beard, maroon pants, a baggy yellow shirt, brown vest, a dark waist coat, and [00:22:00] a British brown pointed hat. The thing that made this creature really hideous was its eyes and teeth. It looked like it was grinning, and its teeth were jagged and pointed.

The eyes were little beaty and dark and mean. So as it stared at Charlie and her husband, it reached into the pond and grabbed a koi fish. Dropped the fish into its mouth and swallowed it. Charlie's husband pushed the window, opened a few inches and screamed at the creature telling it to leave their yard, or he called the police, the gnome grinned, laughed and gave them the finger.

Garrett: What this is, this is reading like if anybody's ever watched the leprechaun trilogy, 

Kenny: kind of Yeah. 

Garrett: Or is there more than just the, the trilogy is 

Kenny: there four of 'em? Shit. Uh, it's like six or seven. 

Garrett: Good God. 

Kenny: They told the police they had an intruder, but the officer was looking around the yard at 4:00 AM found only shoe prints the size of a small child.

So this thing just started to [00:23:00] harass them. It came back night after night holding a yarn ornament and eating their fish. They eventually moved the ornaments and put the fish into a tank in the house. That's when they realized they made a mistake. One night after we had removed the fairies and gnomes and the fish from the yard, this creature showed up to the usual time, 3:00 AM When it found that the yard ornaments were gone and the fish were gone, it went crazy.

It was yelling and screaming something that we couldn't understand, but we did understand that this thing was pissed. He was 

Garrett: screwing that garden gnome, wasn't he? 

Kenny: Ooh. 

Garrett: Why did he get so pissed off that they took the garden gnome statue? I don't 

Kenny: know, but the gnome ran around the house screaming and gurgling.

Then Charlie realized the dog door was unlocked. It was big enough for our dogs to go through, and it would be big enough for that creature to go through as well. She said. I took off running down to the kitchen, and as I got there, the dog started barking like crazy at the dog door. She shut and secured the door, then ran upstairs to shut the [00:24:00] windows.

A fear hit me like nothing I have ever felt, and I ran back up to the twin's bedroom where they were both sand asleep in their cribs. Neither parents slept that night that decided to leave the farm at Porterville. The last we heard of that creature was a very loud screeching cackling sound. It was under one of the living room windows.

And when my husband went to check it, he saw that that the top of the creature's hat under the window, right. Then we decided that we were out of there. We could not stay there with that creature. So were they in the same house? So the author of this article, this got the report. He's, he, uh, told Charlie about Tammy's experience, description of the barn and everything else.

Sounds just like it in the Tule River runs behind the house. So was there some kind of evil gnome lived in this property and it, was it just harassing families that live there 

Garrett: or was this like a, kinda like a sling ba, sl, uh, [00:25:00] situation going on here? We just got like a, uh. Dude with some kind of really bad deformity living in a shed behind someone's house eating their koi fish.

Yeah, I don't Screwing their garden gnomes, screwing their gardens while dressed as a garden gnome 

Kenny: Man, I couldn't even, like 

Garrett: he's, oh, I have molesting the lawn ornaments. 

Kenny: I couldn't imagine. Like you wake up at 3:00 AM and you see this little weird like creature like screaming and it just picks up a koi fish and like s swallows it.

Koi fish are big. Okay. Like, I don't know if people who don't understand how big koi fish actually are, they're, they're like a kind of carp and they get, they can get very large. So the fact that it just, like, it was that small, but yet it just picked one out of the pond and just like swallowed it, like slurped it down, it's gullet.

That's creepy. 

Garrett: So we, what, what'd you picture in here? Kind of like a, like a Loony Tunes kind of thing where he just kinda like gulps [00:26:00] the whole big thing down. It's as about as big as he is. 

Kenny: Something like that. Now if we go back to the East coast, so this is an account that came from, uh, Virginia. So an aunt and uncle of the witness.

They had a nice little one story home that they were selling and getting ready to move out of, and she was helping them clean up the place. So she went to go get some blankets, and as she moved along the hallway, she noticed that the door to the attic was open. So this is her report. I had been in and out of the house all day and knew that, and knew that not one person had been into the attic.

My mom, the test addicts and, and my aunt won't be caught dead climbing up into one. So I found this all to be a little strange. I continued on my way to the room where I gathered the blankets and then headed back into the hallway. As I was leaving, I looked up into the open attic and there appeared a man to this day.

His appearance has always baffled me. Where he was not so much a man, [00:27:00] but an elf like creature. He wore his hair long and over. It was a pointed hat. His clothes were tattered and I can remember them being green. His skin was brown and his eyes black. He was small. I don't want to say a midget for, I mean to offend no one.

And so for the sake of being politically correct, I will just say that he was no taller than three feet. He was not a lean creature and was actually quite round around the middle. He sat hunched over the square, opening of the attic, looking down at me with a malicious grin. Come here, little girl. He said to me, to which I did not respond.

Little girl. Come up here, he said again, his voice I remember was a harsh one, high pitched, but at the same time, deep and threatening. Even as a child, I knew that what I was seeing was not human, and it was not good. I stood there in a sort of paralyzed state, staring at this thing in the attic for it seemed like an eternity while [00:28:00] he again and again repeated.

Come here little girl. Come here, little girl. Then as if my brain was finally able to get through to my feet, I ran, I believe I would have run through a wall of linebackers to get it outta that house. I could hear him laughing as I took off a dangerous laugh, one. At this day, we'll raise the hairs on my arms and neck.

Immediately I told my mother and aunt what had experienced, and they just as immediately wrote me off as having an overactive imagination. And after much pleading, I got them to go into the hallway where lo and behold, the attic door was open and the light was still on. The little man I had described to my mother and aunt had vanished, but it was obvious that I was not the one who had done this.

Being that I was not of the right height to even reach the door. Let alone the light inside, which hung another three feet above the opening. Needless to say, the packing was left unfinished and the three of us promptly left the house with a phone call to my aunt's [00:29:00] ex, informing him he could finish emptying the house himself.

So a little kid who couldn't reach the attic looks up and sees some creepy thing, trying to lure her to come closer to to do who God knows what to her. 

Garrett: It's. Probably he'd be like, oh, that was just your uncle. He, yeah, he, he a little bit of a Quasimodo type. 

Kenny: But what, what I'm wondering is, so the aunt and her mom, both loathed addicts, did something similar happen to them when they were kids, and that's why they didn't want to go in any addict, because they also had an experience when they were children, but just didn't say anything.

And that's when they, when they saw the open, uh. Door. They're just pieced outta there. 

Garrett: I mean, possibly. 

Kenny: Yeah. It's not meant 

Garrett: maybe they both got, uh, diddled in the attic. Ugh. 

Kenny: It's not mentioned at all, but it's something to think [00:30:00] about, you know? So like with these, with knowns, it seems to like range from, oh, it's just a little, like happy little, uh.

Little guy, Woodland creature that's like, you know, it's helpful. 

Garrett: Yeah. Just a little goober, just a chill little dude. Yeah. Little guy. Yeah. You know, 

Kenny: he like, he, he moves rocks outta the road for people and like, uh, he's just like a chill guy who's, uh, bouncing around or driving around and like a little tiny little go-kart too.

Garrett: He's just vibing off the shrooms. Yeah. 

Kenny: And it ranges from that to. Evil creatures that are trying to torment and harass families and do God knows what to them. All I know is 

Garrett: maybe homey had a bad trip, 

Kenny: maybe, uh, that would, uh, that would be creepy. I don't, I man, seeing one of those gnomes like, oh man, I don't know what I would do.

Maybe I'd try to bust out a rod iron or [00:31:00] cold iron nail and all. Buy a blunder bus, load it full of wrought iron nails. And when that little guy was, uh, trying to eat my koi fish, uh, he could, uh, get some shrapnel going his way. 

Garrett: I'd just stick a bunch of little rat traps all over the place. Like a Loony Tunes cartoon.

Well get a bunch of Lucky charm cereal and place it out. 

Kenny: Or, you know what we gotta do is we gotta dig around and we gotta find a four week clover and then we'll get a slingshot. And we'll put the four-Leaf clothing in the slingshot and we'll launch it down his throat. 

Garrett: Well, that's a leprechaun, my dog.

Kenny: Yeah. Oh, that's what I was talking about. The movie. If you, I, you guys have not seen Yeah. Any of the leprechaun horror movies you could, they're um, they're ridiculous. They're kind of funny. There's even one where he is in. 

Garrett: All I have to say is ah, yes. It exists. Yeah, [00:32:00] that's about all I gotta say about that.

There's even, there's even, there's even 

Kenny: one where he's in the ghetto and he's under these guys like, uh, car with like the hydraulics where like, like they can like bounce and stuff and like they realize he's under the car, so they start like smashing him off the road under their car. It's, it's pretty funny.

Garrett: He also kills somebody with a fro pick. 

Kenny: Yeah, this shit is just absolutely ridiculous. 

Garrett: Yeah. It's a word that starts with an R.

Kenny: It's, it's regarded as a good movie. 

Garrett: I was thinking racist, but 

Kenny: Oh, I meant like re regarded as in retarded, but you know. 

Garrett: Yeah. And I meant 

Kenny: racist, 

Garrett: so. 

Kenny: But leprechauns are another kind of fairy creature that are associated with gnomes. Kind of. 

Garrett: Kind of. They're both midgets, they're both angry 

Kenny: [00:33:00] and they like to, uh, eat people, I guess.

I don't know. 

Garrett: Yeah. And apparently a duck children. Yeah. 

Kenny: Which is just fricking creepy. I mean, could you imagine being a little kid and like you see that trying to get into your house? If you've liked this episode of Enter the Rift, please like and subscribe and let us know if you've had any encounter with any kind of gnome or strange like fairy creature.

We would love to hear about it. Keep your windows locked and get a good old thing of cold iron so that these evil gnomes don't try to eat you.

Yeah. Anyway, have a good one. 

Garrett: [00:34:00] Peace.